posted by Charleyy Hodson

Prepare to up your Pokemon Master game.

Have you ever wondered why you have to use both your hands to play Pokemon Go? It’s so annoying and is a massive waste of your valuable time because you really should be doing other things with your hands, such as “getting an education” and “giving people the finger”. Well now you can cut off your limbs and still happily catch ’em all because Simone ‘The Robot Lady’ Giertz has invented the hands-free Pokemon Go helmet!

The helmet, which “has more degrees of freedom than America”, lets you catch Pokemon with your face or tongue by carefully slotting your phone into a contraption that dangles right in front of your eyes. And what’s more, Simone stresses that the helmet is “safe, convenient and stuffed with sex appeal” – so what’s stopping you?! Check out her infomercial below…

SPOILER: Simone has “no plan to sell this shit because this helmet makes me feel stupid”. We’re so sorry if we duped you.


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