Club Penguin: An Obituary

1 February 2017, 17:24 | Updated: 17 July 2017, 12:23

We the Unicorns

By Benedict Townsend

Club Penguin is closing this year. To celebrate this landmark website, we look back at some of the most memorable features and moments in its history.

Today is a very sad day indeed, as we have learned that we must begin to say our goodbyes to Club Penguin - or as Benedict Cumberbatch would call it: Club Pengwing.

For the uninitiated, Club Penguin is an online multiplayer game intended for children and filled to the brim with adults trying to test out the limits of the website's automatic swearing-detection technology. There's even an entire Twitter account dedicated to documenting it (and it's filthy). We were gonna share more examples but most have language that's so ridiculously strong we can't share it.



Twitter user @lwtnote has shared a list of some of the best parts of the game - which I don't understand at all cos I've never played it, but hey, maybe it will mean something to you:


The official Club Penguin website broke the news, in a tragic press statement:




We don't know (or, to be honest, care) what 'Club Penguin Island' is, but what we do know for sure is that Club Penguin has brought joy to innocent children and bad, bad swearing adults for over a decade. It should be remembered fondly for its fun games and general meme-tastic nature until the end of time.

So raise a glass of O-Berry soda tonight, for all the virtual penguins that are about to be slaughtered, en masse. They were heroes, they were dreamers - they were you and I.